I've Purchased 50+ Nintendo Switch Games...

The Nintendo Switch came out on March 3rd, 2017.  Looking at my library, it's time to admit that I've got a problem.  As of this writing (May 27th, 2018) I've purchased over 50 games.  I've bought more games for the Nintendo Switch in 15 months than I have in the lifetime of owning a PS3, PS4, Wii, Wii U, Xbox One and Xbox 360 combined.  Only time will tell if there's something so perfect about the Switch that it's reinvigorated my gaming spirit and inspired these purchasing habits, or if I'm simply caught up in the hype.  However, for now (and for fun), I wanted to take a look at my library and share with you my thoughts on each title.  Also, please remember who's writing these reviews and treat this as a little bit of satire.

In alphabetical order (because I couldn't honestly come up with a chronological purchase order), here is my entire Switch's library:

  • Astro Bears - Simple party game, only cost me $1, you can play as a panda: 6.5/10
  • Axion Verge - I got lost for hours and it made me mad, well designed but it reminded me why I hate Metroid-vania style games: 8.5/10
  • Battle Chasers - Still sealed, but Amazon had it for a great price shortly after the announcement of Best Buy’s Gamers Club Unlocked: 8/10
  • Bayonetta 1 - It was a bit too over sexualized to stream and I didn’t know that until I started; combo focused gameplay with some punishing moments : 8/10
  • Bayonetta 2 - Easier and sexier than the first with a better story: 8.6/10
  • Binding of Isaac: Afterbirth+ - Sick and demonic, plenty of poop and fart humor, very easy to pick up and play a quick round (because you'll die super fast): 8.5/10
  • Brawlout - This is the definition of “don’t try to be someone you aren’t” (I can’t wait for Smash Bros): 4/10
  • Cave Story+  - A more-linear-than-usual adventure style platformer with a super easy ending if you chose to skimp out on the last 20% of the game: 7.5/10
  • Disc Jam - If Mario Tennis had a frisbee throwing mode, it wouldn’t be half as good as this: 8.4/10
  • Disgaea 5 Complete - I’ve only taken this out of the box to get the title to show up on my Switch’s screen, I hated the demo, the game seems way too grindy, but I got the game for great price on Black Friday: 10/10
  • Donkey Kong Country Tropical Freeze - Only about 25% way through the game, but have yet to find a repetitive-feeling level or puzzle, though I still am likely never to finish it: 9/10
  • DOOM - Impressive textures but frame-rate drops plagued the more crowded battles, cut my teeth in streaming using this as a way of showing off the Switch’s capabilities, broke lots of demon skulls: 7.9/10
  • Dragonball Xenoverse 2 - I can’t play this anymore because if I don’t play it for 48 hours I forget the controls completely: 6/10
  • Earth Wars - I only bought it because it was much cheaper than the regular price on steam, but it’s not pretty and I didn’t give it a fair shot: 5/10
  • Enter the Gungeon - It’s punishingly hard and the RNG looks to screw you over just hard enough that you have to play again: 8.2/10
  • Floor Kids - Zero replayability in my book but my best single stream to date, fun and intuitive: 8/10
  • Golf Story - Charming, longer than expected, quality gameplay: 8.5/10
  • Gonner - One of the few rouge-like games I haven’t been able to get into, it’s got a good look but the mechanics didn’t click: 6.5/10
  • Graceful Explosion Machine - An early title with a ‘Geometry Wars’ vibe, killed time between near-launch releases but likely wouldn’t give it a second glance today: 6/10
  • Guns, Gore & Cannoli - Super Italian: 10/10
  • Has-Been Heroes  - The most difficult game I’ve played on the Switch so far, even once you get the gameplay down it's frustrating enough to make you throw your Switch: 7/10
  • Hyrule Warriors - I bought it for a third time for $60, you tell me: 9/10
  • Kamiko - Probably wouldn’t give it a chance if it came out today, but glad I experienced it, very simple and fun to speed run: 7/10
  • Labo (Robot) - I’ll tell you once I reach my goal on Twitch: ?/10
  • Labo (Variety) - I’ll tell you once I reach my goal on Twitch: ?/10
  • Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild - It had frame rate drops but so did God of War 4 and they both get: 10/10
  • Lego Marvel - I don’t know a bulk of these characters but the game was on sale, your typical Lego game: 7/10
  • Mario + Rabbids Kingdom Battle - The biggest shocker from E3 last year, phenomenal tactics gameplay and quality characters from Ubisoft: 9.1/10
  • Mario Kart 8 Deluxe - It’s Mario Kart: 9/10
  • Metal Slug 3 - They managed to do ‘nostalgia’ without muddying up this antique port: 7/10
  • NBA Playgrounds - I only am happy I bought this because eventually I’ll get Shaq Fu for free as an apology: 2/10
  • Overcooked - Never finished because the friend I played this with wasn't good enough to hard-carry me: 7.2/10
  • Oxenfree - I can't not-recommend this game enough: 1/10
  • Plague Road - Only booted once, graphically simple (to a fault) but gameplay was solid for a rogue-like, grid-based tactics game: 6.8/10
  • Pokken Tournament DX - Plenty of fighters, limited content (even for a fighting game), but it's still Pokemon: 8.3/10
  • Rayman Legends - I wish I spent more time with this but a lot of games came out around the same time I bought it; a lot of my friends liked it so: 7.8/10
  • Rocket League (digital) - Bought at midnight and took 14 games to win my first: 8.7/10
  • Rocket League (physical) - Was cheaper to buy than the DLC it came with: 8.7/10
  • Shovel Knight Treasure Trove - I can't even say anything sarcastic or funny here, my only disappointment is that I waited until the Switch to play it: 9.5/10
  • Skyrim - The same buggy, glitchy masterpiece of years past, but it still cost me $60: 8.6/10
  • Sonic Mania - A love letter to traditional Sonic fans, too bad I'm not a traditional Sonic fan: 7.4/10
  • South Park: The Fractured But Whole - Game breaking glitches aside, this was just as crude as one would want wrapped inside some well-polished gameplay: 8.8/10
  • Splatoon 2 - Sabotaged by Nintendo's inability to figure out online matchmaking in a way that would appeal to the west, this game is otherwise a perfect successor: 9.6/10
  • Stardew Valley - I put about 35 hours into the valley the first 10 days I owned it, but was able to put it down and never feel the need to pick it up again: 8.5/10
  • Steamworld Dig 2 - A Metroid-vania style game that was in "easy" mode the entire time, so I never got mad at it: 8.5/10
  • Super Mario Odyssey - The best 3D Mario game to date, but I used the amiibos to make the game much easier than intended: 8.5/10
  • Super Meat Boy - Bought on a whim, played for a little, regretted it, tried it again a few months later, still not impressed: 6.8/10
  • Wizard of Legend - My absolute favorite rogue-like to date, makes 45 minute runs seem like nothing, almost unlimited combinations of arcana: 9/10
  • Wulver Blade - Side scroller beat-em-up with a deep story, played it one afternoon with a friend, didn't beat it, haven't launched it since: 7/10
  • WWE 2K18 - The quality of this game broke my heart as a wrestling fan, so imagine a dumpster that's caught on fire, that's inside a much bigger dumpster that's also on fire: -6/10
  • Xenoblade Chronicles 2 - Story is great, gameplay is great, even the non-traditional leveling structure is great, however the English voice acting is so bad and handheld video quality made my eyes bleed: 9.1/10

Am I way off base on any of these titles?  Let me know in the comments below, yell at me in the Discord, or give me a piece of your mind during the GameZilla Podcast (every Monday at 7 PM ET over at twitch.tv/gamezillamedia).

Joshua Testasecca